Noe Valley Couples Therapist - Counselor

(415) 550-8725


My Huffington Post Article on Work-Life

Click here to read my article on how overwork is harming families.

Hazards of Commuting

Without reading the original studies, I’d take the quantitative claims of these recent findings with a grain of salt, but it’s not much of a stretch to imagine that long commutes are generally stressful on relationships.  I would agree there are a variety of stress factors.  High on my list would be time and energy away […]

Lewis CK On Kids, Texting, and Feelings (Video)

He nails it on so many fronts:

Connected Yet Alone – How Social Media Corrode Relationship

One of my favorite quotes (from Pete Pearson) is that good communication is an unnatural act.  And unfortunately, as I have to remind my couples all the time, technology is conspiring with our instincts for connection, but at the cost of disconnection from the person in front of us.  Texting, email and other social media […]

Dan Siegel on How to Help Integrate Your Kids’ Brains

…And connect with them at the same time! Dan Siegel is a researcher at UCLA who has done lots of great work integrating neuroscience with attachment and mindfulness.  He’s also a great speaker if you ever get to see him.  This is a nice little snippet about how to “remember” events with your kids that […]

Raising Emotionally Intelligent Kids

For several years I have taught classes at a local parent resource center on this important topic. One of my clients just sent me a wonderful blog article that summarizes the crucial points quite concisely: Acknowledge.  For those who want to explore this further (which I highly recommend!), essential reading for parents is How to […]

Adam Phillips on Happiness and Frustration

Adam Phillips is a deep and eloquent thinker. Here’s a fine little piece on the overvaluing of “happiness” relative to (for example) frustration:

Happy – The Movie

I previously recommended the movie “I AM,” by Tom Shadyac. This is another movie, executive produced by him, which is a good exploration of the current research on happiness with some beautiful vignettes of people living happily in the simplest conditions. Happiness does not come from what many people believe.  If you don’t see the […]

What I’ve Learned About Relationships

Margarita Tartakovsky, working on a new article for, provided a wonderful prompt that gave me an excuse to condense the essence of my current thinking about couples and relationships. Here it is! 1. Relationships are complicated. Let’s start with one human brain: one of the most complex structures that we know of in the […]

Different Kinds of Couples In Therapy

A Sampling Every couple is unique, and I love working with all kinds of relationships. Obviously the richness and complexity of couples therapy exceeds what can be expressed on a web page. The following vignettes are but a few of the wide variety of situations I see, but they should give you an idea of […]

Top 10 psychologists in San Francisco, CA 2015

Congratulations to Robert Solley PhD for winning the 2015 Patients' Choice Awards in San Francisco Psychologist